BOB DAVIS ART
A. Background
New York City is a bug city. It is so big it is the biggest city in the United States of America, but not the biggest in the world - that honor goes to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, which has over 42 million people.
People either love New York (IJNY), or they hate it, depending on how well they get along with the 2.3 million other people on the same sidewalk as you at that very moment, all walking into Bloomingdales at the very same time as you, to go to that sale and get the pumps at 50% off. Some people love the rush they get from working the sales at "Bloomies" while other people just don't seem to get it. They don't get the excitement, the thrill of finding a size 6 camisole with red edging for only $12. ONLY $12! It was $42 at Saks the other week, those suckers.
Most people who live in New York are either very rich, living in historic carriage houses with private outdoor decks, also known as "townhouses," on the upper east side; or they are very poor, living in someone's closet on the lower east side trying to make it as a "musician," collecting "Beevis and Butthead" figurines off EBay.
New York gives off a particular odor, which has changed in the years since Giuliani was mayor.
History of New York City
New York was founded in 1642 by Matthias Gingershiffstle. Matthias was the prominent son of a prominent Dutch banking family from the Dutch city of Dutchdammer. He grew up on Dutchdammerplatz, a very expensive street, indeed. At the age of 42, Matthias left the family bank to found a new bank in the New World. As the colonies at that time were primarily (solely) agricultural, and there were Indian raids every now and then, Matthias was ahead of his time in starting a bank. So far ahead, that the bank failed, and he was forced to return home to his parents penniless and broke, with no money to his name, having lost all his money in his failed bank. But he left behind the successful port city of New Amsterdamsterplotz, soon to be renamed New York by the British who overthrew the Dutch in the famous Battle of Trafalgar Square in 1722.
New York was the center of the Industrial Revolution in the American Colonies, what with the factories and the speculators and the stock manipulators and the sweatshops and those guys on 43rd who cheat the tourists out of their hard-earned twenties with fast talking and cards up their sleeves and three-card monty tricks that they must learn from the local New York public schools. Railroad apartments were abundant, cheaply made and subject to horrific fires that killed all the workers forced to live 20 to a room at one time, 40 when you took into consideration that they lived in shifts.
The city's politics have always been particularly bloody, especially in the period between 1878-1904 when 14 mayors and 432 city-council members were assassinated by anarchists, "conservatives," and other undesirables. The violence ended when Paddy Murphy, local beat cop in the Brooklyn neighborhood of Paducah, brought the rival gangs of Puerto-Rican Council-members and Italian Assembly-members together for a final dance scene where the last survivors come to their senses after the horror of Maria's death.
In 1945, World War II veterans start arriving home to the city, ready to move to the Jersey suburbs.
New York City was hit hard by the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001, but has rallied back hard since then, becoming the centerpiece for a national revival of patriotic fervor and fever. The city also wants to host an upcoming Olympics to prove they're back, baby.
Size of New York City
Oh-My-God New York City is big. There are five separate and distinct Islands that make up the outer boroughs of New York: Manhattan, Satin Island, Long Island and Block Island. The ferry system between these islands is huge. There are a total of 112,301 separate ferry trips every single day. The island of Manhattan alone comprises exactly 92.254 hectares, not including the Cloisters, owned separately by the carmelite nuns of the order of Saint Manhattan.
New York Timeline
1911 Mayor LaGuardia declares all loose change to be his. Please empty your pockets.
1923 "Eat at Joe's" restaurant becomes all the rage in the Roaring Twenties, mostly because unknown to the patrons at the time, Joe uses cocaine in his soft drinks.
1932 During the Depression, thousands of Wall Street brokers jump. The financial sector is experiencing difficulty at this time. "Please come back later" becomes the newest slogan in New York's ongoing tourism campaign.
1941 War! New York strippers donate their silk stockings to the cause.
1953 The era of the Corporate Drone begins in earnest, allowing men to commute for hours in suit and tie, always wearing a white shirt for the entire decade of the Fifties, never varying, never wandering, feeling comfortable, very comfortable in their constricting white shirts while the wife stays home all day waiting for the postman and the milkman to come and deliver the goods.
1968 Nixon accepts Republican Nomination in New York as Mayor Lindsey looks on in horror at what he has wrought. Riots erupt. Chicago police quickly show up to subdue the rioters. The war in Vietnam is to blame, and soon-to-be President Richard Nixon vows to end the war in mere days if he is elected, thus putting Humphrey in his place.
1973 Marshal Law is declared. Meanwhile elsewhere Marshall McLaren declares the "Medium is the Message," creating an existential dilemma for the City of New York - Is the Center of the country's Media real or created? Are the Media Empires real or assumed? How can we know for sure? Who will tell us when to tune in and when to turn on? We watch the TV as much as we can, but we find no answers, get no satisfafaction. We go to the movies, to no avail. The end is nigh and who are we to complain?
1984 Cameras are installed at all the intersections in New York.
1990 The Statue of Liberty is completely rebuilt by Lee Iacocca as a tribute to his immigrant parents from Lithuania.
1994 Sherbert! The Central Park Zoo reopens just in time to reap the benefits of the Sherbert Craze sweeping the city!
2001 After 9/11, even the French declare "We are all Americans" in support of New Yorkers.
2004 The Republican Convention returns to New York at the exact same time as the largest demonstrations in the city's history just happen to be around the corner from Madison Square Garden right then! What a remarkable coincidence!
New York Tourism
There used to be tourist stops of a "sexual" nature throughout the city centered in Times Square, but as of 10 years ago, they all moved to New Jersey and Connecticut along with the suburban exodus of the middle managers who are their primary clientele. In the meantime, the Walt Disney Company has been so kind as to set up shop throughout the city, taking over the real-estate comprising 98% of the retail space available in New York, occasionally leasing it back to some restaurants and Korean grocers.
Tourism is the 3rd largest industry of New York, after Wall Street Banking and Bridge Tolls. Tourism accounts for 12% of the city's economy, but 97% of its theater ticket sales.
I recommend a walking tour, starting at the Flatiron building and walking along 7th Avenue through the garment district, to Astoria Park Place where the Hard Rock Cafe is a pleasant diversion for tea; on to Park Avenue, up along past the rowhouses and road-houses, past the rodeo and the carnival, on past the museums of fine and imported art and artistically-inspired exhibitions (if you're lucky there may be a Picasso exhibition going on - watch for the crowds!) then turn left into Central Park, around the reservoir, past the gate with the graffiti about Sal and his remarkable abilities, for a stop at the Natural History Museum of the New York Species, where there are dioramas about Wall Street Brokers, Hell's Kitchen Butchers, and if you're lucky they will have finished the new diorama on the Lawyers at work suing you for ignoring their exhibit. At this time, if you're tired, you should probably rest, but if not, up we go into Harlem for a soda at the soda fountain at the Corner Soda Fountain at Amsterdam and 154th. Now would be a good time to catch a cab back to your hotel. And so ends our walking tour.
This knowledge entry was written by BD, REL and DAL.
If you are using this for a school paper, please remember to credit the "Bob Davis Knowledge Base"
All photos found through the New York City Government Website.
last updated February 19, 2007
Send any email corrections you may have to the "webmaster":
bob
at
bobdavisart
dot
com
© 2007 Bob Davis Art